Breathing Room

This is a song I wrote and recorded on November 11, 2011 (11/11/11) without audio from a scene in Alphaville.

 11 11 11 by taliea



I've found over my blogging/music-making experience that it is possible for one to commit the flaw of talking too much about one's music.

I always have the urge to explain away why I do a certain thing in music, to try to justify why I wrote a line this way or made the music go that way, or why the hell did I have a French lady talking over some of the prettiest music I've ever made?

I've come to realize that this is proof that I don't trust my own art. If I can't let my music stand by itself, without me behind it, defining it, holding it up like a cripple, then I don't think my music will ever walk on its own into the hearts of listeners, to let them form their own ideas and opinions about it. I'm afraid at points it has almost come to the point where the audience listens to me and my justification of my music rather than the music itself.

I was planning for days how I would write this blog. I had all my arguments planned out, how I would justify my ideas, show my motivation for writing this that way and that the other way. I would write my explications so well that you would have no choice but to agree with me that this is indeed a good piece of impressionistic music, and would yourself look down your nose at people who would so preposterously disagree with me, because they "just don't get the art."

Instead, I refrain. I don't want to choke my music. If the music cannot stand by itself in the world, then perhaps it is not meant to stand. I won't always be able to come to the defense of my art, to be able to explain why this is a good song, and beg you to accept it, despite its minor flaws.
My songs will always stand in my own heart, because I love every piece of music that I write, though they are always far from perfect.

All this to say, this song is a kind of milestone in my music-making career, for reasons that I will explain (probably in a later post, as I am sleep deprived) later. I realize that the song (if you can call it that) is a bit bazaar, and not exactly easy to listen to. But I love it for a couple reasons, mostly having to do with my new approach for music-writing that I used (which I will also explain later).

If you've gotten nothing else from this blog, just understand this: In your own artistic endeavors, after publishing a work, you must be very careful to keep your voice down, because you might be in danger of drowning out the voice of your own art. And history can tell us that Art has the potential to have the most powerful voice of all. It just first needs a little breathing room.